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Monday, August 3, 2009

BEHOLD! The Latest Twilight Crap!

Witness, all, the latest- or is it lamest?- marketing attempt since Team Edward Burger King crowns and Twilight themed Jesus tee's with " Jesus is 'Thelight'" on them (well, maybe that ad was the other way around, adverting church, but still)!

Now, for you Twilighters out there, I have nothing against Twilight (erm... maybe a bit). But what shall be said by me throughout this post is rather snarky in nature. Prepare yourselves :)

What am I talking about, you ask? Witness also the button. See that red circle on the cover? Anyone care to read it for us?

Fine, I will:

"Bella and Edward's favorite book!"

0_o EXCUSE me? One more time please?

It says that the classic, Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte, that wonderful moody romantic awesome enduring work, is Bella and Edward Cullen's, fictitional vamps everyone but me and a few select others seem to be obsessed with, favorite book. Therefore, you have to read it. Or they shall come suck your blood (though apparently, some tween girls may have that on their wishlist for Christmas. Anyone see that E! News segment last week?).

I just need to step back from this computer and take a deep breath, turn to the person next to me (in which case that would by my dog Maddi. Well, things that can't talk tend to be good listeners to of my snarkalicious comments, eh?) and get it all out.

But I won't. Because I want to get my opinions out (as per usual- anyone out there schocked by this? :P) and I REALLY want to hear your thoughts too.

My first thought that comes to mind to share with you lovely people? Ready? Crank your hearing aids up everyone.

*Deep breath*

W.

T.

F.???????!!!!!

I can't believe that somewhere in the UK, Marketing and Sales people thought this would be a good idea. So putting a now-cliched cover on a book and slapping a sticker on there saying some fiction characters SO many people are wicked obsessed with now, like it, so no matter the quality of it and without knowing what it's about, will make teens crazy and buy it?

Apparently so. It's selling like hotcakes.

Wuthering Heights is one of my favorite books, and it's really sad that people are taking this great classic thing and using it as just another ploy to sell ANOTHER vampire romance remake. Again, no offense to Twilighters.

So, what do you think? Can't wait to see these comments. I bet some obsessed 9 year old will stumble upon my blog and rant :P I can see it now... "Um, Meggin! Edward is hotttttt with like 5 t's and a a and... a w. So why you hatin' on Twilight? Next you'll be digging on Hannah Montana. Riduculous." Of course, it'll be much more hilarious than that *devious smile* And as to the Hannah Montana digs? I think we all agree this'll be much, MUCH to easy. (Which reminds me, look for my post about Wings tommorrow. I'll put a review in between for your protection from my ranting ;)) BTW, I totally ripped this nine year old stuff off from Margo's awesome comment- sorry, Margo :)

P.S. Hope none of you are offended? :D

UPDATE: Me again. So I was reading and replying to your lovely comments and I looked at the cover again. Notice the caption:

"love never dies..."

...like vampires? Is that what was to be implied? That Heathcliffe and Cathy are like vampires, therefore read it? *sigh* Here we go again...

Doesn't it say something to that affect on the cover of Twilight?

Also, they're blatantly copying Twilight's cover. From the font to that caption to that WAY too obvious button to that flower. Ok, I have to get away from this and just take a break. I'm getting a bit... ANGRY. LOL, sorry, just kidding :)

Y'know, I like this ranting posts. It's cathartic. And I have so much book-related material to work on :) Like that Pride and Prejudice and Zombies thing, for example. Anyone else slighty angered or irked by that?

12 comments:

Lolita said...

Wow. I am so with you. That is the stupidest thing any book publisher has EVER done.... Ever.

Sunkissed said...

Aghh!!!! I totally agree with you! I like twilight and all but why wast a perfectly good book to some..... OH WOW!!! But i guess if it inspires readers to read more classics, than power to them!!

xoxoxo
Rachel

margo said...

Dear Meggin,

my name is anna and i LOVE EDWARD CULLEN! If it weren't for the loser ...ummm...whatsherface....Bella Swan (???) I would be his forever. how can you hate Twilight. It is like the most...amsomest....bestest....most umm....plot twisting and umm....intellectual book out there today! Anything with a DISCO BALL SHINING VAMPIRE out there I'll read. Oh and i love too how the book tells me that if I don't get what I want then I become a heart broken loser!! Thanks!! umm for that aweful review Anna the 9 year old who like Hannah Montana too (*SHUDDER*)


HAHHAAH I'm sorry Meggin. When I saw your post I just HAD to pretend to be an idiotic 9 year old. I'm sorry, but all this "TWILIGHT" shit is well that BULL SHIT *SORRY FOR THE BAD WORDS!* I've read all the books and I thought they were ok. I mean the 1st was good. It drew you in and made you think. . . but then as they went on it went from interesting characters to "ROLL YOUR EYES THIS IS SO BORING AND PREDICTABLE" I REALLY don't see how people can be so addicted. Where's the plot? The growth of characters? The depth of story? I mean with Mr. Darcy, he was a real character. But Edward Cullen's wants to commit suicide because he can't have Bella? What does that show people?

And for them to slander the cover of a FAMOUS AND CLASSIC literary piece with the low graded Twilight that's gross. Find something else that will interest the kids in Classics. They won't even understand the writing. Ugh that disgusts me!

Sincerely,

Margo (who completely and totally agrees with you!)

ps sorry about the super SUPER long post. But I hate twilight and well I can't vent to my turtle since he only wants food from me :(

pps I quickly re-looked at the cover and it makes me shake my head in disgust. Ok. I'll leave now :)

La Coccinelle said...

This marketing tactic may sell more copies, but it doesn't mean Twihards will actually be able to get through it. I like reading some classics, but Wuthering Heights was one book I just could not get into. The short attention span of many Twilight fans (especially the young ones) practically guarantees that most of those copies will sit, unread, on a bookshelf somewhere.

It's great for the publisher, of course. But it's kind of a waste of paper to print books that people only buy because they're now considered "Twilight-related" (and not because they're actually going to read them).

(And as far as I can recall, Edward never mentioned Wuthering Heights. He's probably read it, though... because he's PERFECT. *snicker* But I guess just putting "Bella's Favourite Book" on the cover might have some people saying, "Bella who?")

austenfan said...

Wuthering Heights is one of my favorite books as well. And this kind of stunt (however untintentionally done) degrades this great book. No offense to Twilight (I mean, I loved Twilight and I consider myself as a bit of a Twilighter too) but in terms of it's gravity as a literary work, Wuthering Heights is just so way up there as compared to Twilight. I guess, they just want the book to appeal to the younger crowd who are yet to read it.

Meggin said...

Thanks for all your comments guys! Glad so far no rants that are all for this :)

Margo, I LOVED that comment! The Hannah Montana was an excellent touch for Anna, lol :) You're right about the suicide thing- what is that teaching the gullible tweens reading this book a lot of the time? As to the turtle, hold his food hostage so he'll listen extra good? :)

Coccinelle- Exactly :) I didn't think of that, but you're right. Many twihards (thanks to you guys for introducing that new term to me) are tweens who won't understand a word of this.

Austenfan- Right too. It is pretty degrading to something like this. But like you said, at least it'll maybe get kids to read something BESIDES Twilight (my friend is on her third round for the series. I honestly think the girl could start a communist communityy in which people on wear twilight shirts and read the series only :P)?

Thanks for all your comments, guys, and I can't wait to read more :) Sorry for the long comment- my blog though, heheh :) Oops, went powermad there for a sec. I'm back :P

Sasha said...

Ohmygosh! What THE Indiana Jones is wrong with these crazy publishers who think it is okay to vandalise an amazing novel with pretentious CRAP that some ridiculous FICTIONAL couple made up. Doesn't Twilight have enough publicity??! Can't it survive without ruining EVERYTHING!!!???? I mean honestly I've never read any Twilight books and to be frank I'm not exactly dying to either! Now every Twilight freakin' obsessed tween out there is just going to remember one of the greatest and most classic books ever written as 'Bella and Edwards fave'. Like it even matters!!! They totally degraded Wuthering Heights as an equal to the Twilight Saga with the same cover and everything. To be perfectly honest, I wouldn't be surprised if they made a whole other planet dedicated to Twilight. I mean it has just gotten SO out of hand!!

Woah, sorry for the crazy rant but I'm back now. XD
xxx

Sara from DBR said...

Umm, Meggin. Edward is hawttttt!

Okay, real me now. Although RPatz isn't that bad to look at :P

I do like the Twilight books and film (and also Hannah Montana, sorry Margo! And Wizards of Waverly Place and Sonny With A Chance... And the Suite Life of Zac and Cody :L) but that is a bit too far. I agree with your other commenters - most of the die-hard Twilight fans are probably too young to be able to finish Wuthering Heights and a) like it, and b) know wth it's about.

Don't really have a clue what a classic (and great) novel has to do with a modern-day vamp romance. It's getting waaaay too much hype.

And guess what I saw last week? In Borders I decided to check out the YA books even though I always end up buying something (and I did :L) and the whole first bookshelf of books were titled 'If you like Twilight, you'll love these...' and a whole million vampire books; most of them were only written after Twilight became famous!!! Shocking. Although you do get SOME good ones, e.g. the Night World series (written in 1997 or something) which looks AWESOME and HoN, which I (L).

Sorry for yet another long comment on this post :L

And it's okay to be powermad :L :)

Meggin said...

Weeeeell... ok, I'll admit he is cute. But like, I don't have a crush on him. But you're right, he isn't exactly repulsive ;)

Oops, sorry about the Miley Cyrus thing Sara :P You're totally right about that vampire section! Most of them were just published, and almost exactly like Twilight. It's kind of sickening how much hype is around it :P But yes, there are some really good ones out there, like you said, like HoN (haven't read it but I hear rave reviews of it!)

Wow, Sasha, tell us how you really feel about Twilight ;) Exactly about the degrading of Wuthering Heights! I'm sorry Twihards, but it's just another book. Get excited of Jane Austen, for God's sake :P But Wuthering Heights is a true classic, and it's degrading to put it equal to another teen vamp remake.

I think this really has become a touchy subject. Look at all this! There's so much hype, and all that, and it's totally blown out of proportion. :P

:S Oops, there I go ranting again! Everyone else feel free to rant more :)

**NeonGlitter** said...

Meggin thats total rubbish twilight ruls an if its bella n edwards faverit book then its mine toooooo and ill so buy it! whoop! next thfing i no ull b dissin hannah montana n all that stuff ur so evil tryin to spoil every nine yr olds stuff ur meanie. im only 9 u shood b nice to me yh
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Haha! Had to pretend to be a nine year old. Actually, at the beginning of last year I was nine but IM NOT AS STUPID AS THE STUPID NINE YEAR OLD WHO WROTE THE ABOVE! (Nope I don't mean Meggin who is above this comment, I meant the bit above the wiggly line!)

margo said...

Hahah sorry Sara!!!!!!!!! It's just well I don't think she's exactly talented and I'm tired of Hollywood becoming a talent less place! What I can't understand (and maybe this is because I was born in 1765) is the WHOLE obsession with vampires in the YA world. THEY"RE EVERYWHERE! I bet if they existed they'd be like

"SHOOT! WE'VE BEEN DETECTED!! PLAY LIKE WE'RE RPATZ!"

I'm just tired of bad books getting good fame (uh hem . . Twilight!!)

Poor Heath Cliff. I bet he never would understand tweens going "OMG!! HEATH CLIFF IS SO RPATZ!"

and btw Sasha I'm totally stealing your "What THE Indiana Jones is wrong...." :D It's now been MARGOTIZED!

Imogen said...

Right, well hate to spoil the non rant part but Twilight is good. It's actually amazing and I love it. soooo i don't know what you're on about also hannah is the best person that ever lived.

sorry guess us bloggers can't help but pretend. i do love twilight but now they've spoilt it! Edward ACTION FIGURES??!! COME ON!

But you've got to admit, things like this do give Twilight publicity, even if it's bad. you've just got basically everyone sharing vamp views. This sort of stuff fills everyone with rage. Half the blogosphere has talked about twilight over the past two years.

I love Twilight, but I don't want it wrecked.

Recently I read the final instalment of the Mortal Instruments trilogy. The quote on the front, "A story world I love," Stephanie Meyer is almost enough to put people off but don't be they're really good stories.

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